good night

my darlings, i can't keep my eyes open because of the exhaustion. I had a very busy day and at the end of it my teacher yelled at me because she didn't like the article I wrote in German about education. She complained; "i don't like it", when I did my best . I wanted to scream "don't mind, I don't like you either". And she has been teaching me for 10 years, but she can be a real bitch when she wants. I sense that she is more stressed than me about the  exams. Anyway, before I realised it I began to cry. it was really healing, because I haven't cried for years and I needed it.  A million times I came to almost start crying but  not a drop came out. This anger , this burst was coming up and stayed there, poisoning me. This time I did it. It was like raining, when the earth needs it.

Duckie is still absent and I leave him to rest in my absence. It kills me that he doesn't pick up the phone and call me but we don't always have what we want.

I started another book of Gilbert,  its title is "committed", talks about marriage. I do need some counseling about mine. Sakis and I are having a peaceful, back to normal, time. We are ok, but I think we need to strengthen our marriage.

keep up the good work and take care
i do need some sleep desperately. But i'll be thinking of you, sending you light and energy. Have anyone seen "Somewhere" of Sofia Coppola? I plan to. 
I'm going to the theater tomorrow.

xoxo